no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
