i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
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