that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
