...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
