Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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