I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
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