if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
