This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
