so explain again why im purple
no
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize
