I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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