This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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