theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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