Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
