uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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