you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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