Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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