Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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