cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
