Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
