dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize