In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
