Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize