i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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