3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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