Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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