ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
