yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
