Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
