he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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