We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
