So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
