id be glad to
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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