called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
this boner is exhausting
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
