office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
