Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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