listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i just google imaged poop.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
