haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
