it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
