Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
