angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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