I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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