North Korea, Best Korea!
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Randomize