glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
