Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
