so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
