Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
My legs feel like baby dolphins
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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