Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just had sex on a roof
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
