hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
