did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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