Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
