Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Randomize
